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Quick Question: Do You Have Dandruff?

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It has come to my attention that a lot of people--including some people who write the copy for dandruff shampoo commercials--have no idea what dandruff is. 

Let's end this confusion: Dandruff is not a dry, flaky scalp. Dandruff is, in fact, an oily, flaky scalp, with some fungus thrown in for good measure. You have been mislead to believe that only dry skin flakes, and you deserve the truth.

Here's what's really going on, you guys. Everyone sheds scalp skin, but it usually takes the cells, like, a month in people who don't have dandruff. With dandruff, the cells mature in less than a week, and they shed in bigger, oily clumps, which is why you can see the white spots against the hair.

It's the result of excess sebum (the same thing that can give you zits) and, according to some studies, microorganisms having sex on your head. Kinky!

"Queer bottle-shaped germs" just can't keep it in their micropants.

It is entirely possible to have flakes as a result of an excessively dry scalp, but you're only going to make it worse with dandruff shampoo. That's like treating really dry skin with acne meds.

So, are your flakes white and dry--a sign of dry scalp--or waxy and yellowish? The latter is truly dandruff.

So let's talk about this. Quick Question: Do you have dandruff? Do you really? 


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